A Seasonal Mormon!

Earlier this week... I had a bad day... that morphed into a bad week... I know, I know, there is power in what we "confess" but just where is the balance between the power of life and death being in the tongue and just plain old honesty... besides I didn't actually SAY anything... I wrote it and I'm pretty sure (because I asked a really holy super connected to God local pastor who said he wasn't sure which means I'm going with NO) that Satan's minions can't read so I don't think they are doing the happy dance of "We got her! We got her!" on her my blog.

So what exactly does one do in the midst of a bad day that has turned into a bad week... the christian response is of course SEEK GOD.... but after the seeking of God... I seek laughter! It really is the best medicine!

So I picked up a little book called Stuff Christians Like by Jonathon Acuff. Parts of it, I admit are a little cheesey but other parts are just plain hilarious.... He shares things that we ALL know and yet NO ONE says ...

One of my favorite passages (awwww.... see I am a good Christian... I automatically refer to portions of books as passages - sigh of relief)... is in Chapter 1 - My Bad.

Being Slightly Less Nice Than Mormons

Have you ever met a Mormon who was a jerk? I haven't. Every Mormon I have ever met has been nice, friendly and well dressed.  But I know they have some.  Surely someone in Utah is a jerk. But for my money, Mormons are slightly nicer than Christians.

HA-LARIOUS!  And... sadly... kind of true... after I was done laughing out loud in my bed by myself (see previous blogs - I'm single which means I sleep alone - another notch on that Christan belt of mine!)... I started to think... From a single girls perspective there ARE just a few things that the Christian church can learn from the Mormons!

For example, have you ever met a single Mormon over the age of 26... I haven't!  And no it's not because they are all being married off as child brides - I'm not talking about the crazy sects where they make their own clothes and look like they stepped off of the set of Little House on the Prairie.... but the main line, we look and dress and act normal (albeit VERY nice as referenced above) Mormon church... again... I haven't. 

A few years ago I worked with a girl who was a Mormon and found out WHY.  When Mormon youth reach the age of approximately 18, they stop going to the "regular" church and spend roughly the next 10 years (or less for the lucky among them) in the SINGLES church.  All of the single Mormons go to church together where they hook up and get married.  WHAT a BRILLIANT idea! And the BRILLIANCE does not stop there!  In the "Singles Church" 4 or 5 single guys are "assigned" to 4 or 5 single girls to do the manly things that a single girl just can't (or shouldn't have to) do on her own... Moving.... no problem! Your assigned single guys pop on over and haul your stuff!  Blizzard?  Put that shovel down! Your assigned single guys come and shovel you out!  Buy new and complicated electronic gadgets!  No need to read the directions because... Here come your single guys!  Seriously, this is BETTER than the Geek Squad... and it's FREE!!!!

I must admit (notch off the super Christian belt) when I learned all of the above, I started to wonder... if I could become a seasonal Mormon... Find my husband (okay technically too old for the singles church but if they don't ask for id... I LOOK younger than I am)... Let Jesus save him and in the process never worry about another move, snow storm or new electronic gadget again!